What you can do when you experience Rejection

Have you ever experienced rejection by your family, friends, or people close to you? A feeling of rejection can be a difficult and painful experience. It can pressure you to act to prove yourself, and your rejection may become your competitor in life. However, it is essential to remember that as a child of God, you are loved and valued, regardless of what others think or say. 

There are many reasons why people may reject others. Some common causes include:

Differences in values or beliefs: 

People may reject others if they hold significantly different values or beliefs.

Fear of vulnerability: 

Some people may reject others to avoid exposure or the risk of being hurt in a relationship.

Past experiences: 

Past experiences, such as previous rejection or trauma, can influence how someone responds to others and may lead them to reject others as a form of self-protection.

Make sure you are not wrongly turning rejection on yourself; people will hate you for many reasons. Some will reject you for being you; for telling the truth, and some biased attitude towards people’s backgrounds. Some people will reject people just because you don’t look like them. People may reject people because they may not be of the same economic, educational status, or ethnic, or tribe as them.

Some people may reject you for being principled. Some people may reject you just because you are honest and transparent, and they feel uncomfortable being around you because you review the flocks without saying anything. 

People may reject you because you are a difficult person: life can only be defined from your view; anyone who disagrees with you becomes your enemy.

What do you do when you experience rejection, especially if it is not for the wrong reasons?

1. Turn to God: 

Your faith is a source of strength and comfort during times of rejection. Remember that God is with you and loves you, no matter what others think or say. Align your life with God’s word. It will help you manage rejection the right way. Also, prayer creates an opportunity to re-create your mind before your creator. God may not instantly change the reason for the denial, but he will change how you handle rejection by people.

2. Seek support from mentors, trusted friends, and loved ones: 

When you’re feeling rejected, it can be helpful to talk to someone you trust and confide in about your feelings, God put people in your lives for different reasons, and times of rejection can be a time to receive support from those in your life. They can offer you comfort and support during this difficult time.

3. Practice self-care:

The wrong way to handle rejection is to isolate yourself. When we separate ourselves, we put pressure on ourselves to do something that will prove that we are better and accept defeat in life. Instead, take care of yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation, such as hobbies, exercise, or spending time with loved ones.

4. Look for opportunities to grow and learn:

While rejection can be painful, it can also be an opportunity for growth and self-reflection. Use it as an opportunity to learn from your experiences.

Remember that rejection is a normal part of life: Everyone experiences rejection at some point. It’s important to remember that rejection does not define you and that you are worthy and valuable, regardless of what others may think or say.

The majority of the people in the world rejected Jesus. It doesn’t matter how many people who is against you. Just know rejection is regular and seasonal. . Some people who left you today can be some people who will bow down to worship and sing praise tomorrow. So, when people reject you, don’t reject yourself.

After several attempts to belong to engage in female relationships, I gave up and concluded it was not for me. Maybe when I got rich, I could pick and choose any lady of my choice class, I thought to myself. Because of my thought, I became neutral toward a female counterpart.

I decided to mind my business until, about 17 years ago, I traveled to a youth camp as the youth president of my church. I went to a restaurant with my co-leaders, and my eyes captured the beautiful lady who helped her aunty to serve at the restaurant because she was on break from her university. We both glanced at each other simultaneously, and she smiled, and I said to myself this is it.

She made my food look exceptionally different from everyone else’s, and my friends were all wondering what was happening. From that day on, I insisted that we all would have to go to the restaurant to eat, not knowing what was behind my decision.

I was always excited to show up at the restaurant with my friends. It became apparent to me that I had developed an affection for her. I was always happy to show off at the restaurant with my friends. It has become evident that I have developed a love for her.

Before the camp meeting was over, I took her contact, and we started talking about life and what the future could become for us.

She said she wanted to go and see me in my town. I will never forget walking down the streets of my town when she visited the first time. I was proud I was walking down the road with the lady who looked like a movie star. However, deep down in my heart, I know it was a prominent emotion that I’ve pursued, and me feeling my emptiness. When we lack a sense of purpose, we tend to find things that can fill our emptiness. 

We agreed for her to meet with my parents, this was her first time, and she stayed with my parents, and my family welcomed her. It has always been a long-distance relationship. We only met in person, not more than twice, and we were hoping for the best thinking of marriage, and we’ve agreed on the month that I would come and officially see her parents. 

I’ve always believed at that time that God has no business with who you marry. My ideology was that if you find the person you love, God will bless the union. But, unfortunately, I had dreams that didn’t go well with me. So I rejected the dreams and prayed against them,  and even said this was the devil trying to distract me from what God was trying to give me. In the midst of me working on the relationship and hoping everything would work out, I knew that I was not convinced, but I neglected so many signs anyway. 

One day she reached out and said she wanted to meet with me. I was shocked with mixed excitement. But, when we met, she asked me a shocking, surprising question. 

She asked me why do I want to marry her? I was confused by the question. So I asked her where the question was coming and going.

She eventually told me to leave her alone and wished me well. I couldn’t believe what had just happened.

I felt rejected and abandoned by the one I was hoping to spend the rest of my life with.

I have dreamt of our wedding night and the beautiful family we would have. But at this moment, I felt my dreams shattered before my eyes, and I was heartbroken.

However, it was hard to let go. I didn’t know what to tell my parents, and I decided to keep trying to understand what was going on. I wanted the relationship to work, so I still had hope and always reached out to see how we could make amends. When I called, she would take my call now and then, but it became less frequent after some time. Sometimes she would go mute on me for at least two to three months.

Finally, one day, I called her number, and someone answered the call, and what I heard from the line was, “why are you bothering my wife? He threatened to deal with me if I ever called his wife again. He told me that they have children.”

I was shocked and heartbroken again.

So this time, I opened up to my dad with a broken heart. I shared with him everything that happened, and he saw my struggle. He encouraged me and gave me great counsel from God’s word. He shared with me a story of how he ended up marrying his wife, which became one of the best decisions of his life. So, he encouraged me to keep an open mind in a relationship, knowing that God’s time is the best.

Today I have been married to my best friend, Chandy, for over Ten years, and I am glad God redirected my rejection to give me beauty for my ashes. The irony is that my ex-finance has the same name as my wife. 

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