Relationships can seem so easy at the beginning. Love comes naturally. But over time, other parts of life compete for your attention. Pretty soon, the relationship isn’t getting much focus. You and your partner both start to wonder where the good times went.
Considering the joy that can come from a healthy relationship and the potential challenges a failed relationship can present, you want to do your best to stay happy together. This is even truer if there are children involved.
Try these strategies to put your relationship back on track quickly:
- Make time for each other. Remember when you first fell in love? Your relationship was a huge priority. You made time for the other person. There wasn’t much you were going to let stand in your way. After a while, time together becomes the thing in your life that gets attention after everything else has been taken care of.
- Setting aside time for a date night once a week or even every other week can be enormously helpful. If you have kids, maybe you can swap babysitting nights with another couple.
- Volunteer together. If contributing to others’ lives is vital to both of you, this is a beautiful way to enhance your relationship. Sharing a positive and meaningful experience can strengthen the bond you share. In addition, time spent like this allows each of you to view the other positively.
- Play together. Find something you both enjoy and do it together. Intimacy is gained during those lighter and happier times, not just when life feels heavy and dramatic.
- Improve how you deal with conflict. When there’s conflict, are you good at working through this together? An excellent way to measure this is to consider whether the conflict will likely happen again. There’s no reason to keep having the same conflict repeatedly. If that happens, you didn’t resolve anything. Instead, focus on finding solutions. The fact that there is a conflict doesn’t suggest that someone is wrong. It simply means that there is a misunderstanding or a disagreement about something. Choose learning and happiness over the need to be correct.
- Take responsibility for yourself. This may be the most important thing you can do for your relationship. Instead of expecting your partner to make you happy, find ways to take care of your needs. Of course, the other side is not spending all your energy trying to make your partner feel satisfied and secure. You can only contribute to their happiness, not create it.
After you’ve been together a while, your relationship will start to take a backseat to other things. However, for your health as a couple, finding enjoyable and meaningful ways to spend your time together is crucial.
No relationship will sustain itself for long without tending. Our partnerships require care and attention, just like anything else worth having. And as is often true, the more you put in, the more you get out.
Try some of the tips above to devote much-needed energy to your relationship. You’ll be amazed at how much joy a little attention to your partner will bring.